Science, Magic and a dash of Ninja

Thursday, November 18, 2004

heed thy call, oh ye great dragon

the cycle returns...it seems to have, actually...i wonder if my hint system has slowly been turning off, or if i've been slowly backing away. I did something terrible, but necessary. The lying wasn't necessary. The Cold Turkey was.

metroid prime 2 is a good game. i like it.

i slowly heal. my skin that is. I remember my mistakes.

what word is the opposite of mistake? I remember those too.

i will go play violin now, because i do.

after a long talk/discovery i had with my brother/Nick, the largest temptations are now among the smallest. I shall do my best to grow. To learn.

I have had my fun time, and i abused it. Sex is not meaningless, but ill leave it for now. Scratching is the only itch that remains, and it dies off as well. I shed. Humanoid must not escape.

I want to scream "Where is she!?", and at the same time, i want to pretend that it is ok, that i can wait. I am ok, though i do dream. Complacent but moving. Ninja.

wow, a few hours since i started this post, my dad came over and hung out with me for a bit. We pretty much had the same talk that wally had with me, about my independence pretty much. i wont get into details, but lets just say that both of them expressed very deeply that they feel i am making the wrong decision about (insert what you know here), and disagree with me about personal responsibility (as far as having power over other people, my dad thinks that people do have power over other people, i say not. My brother says i should care what other people think, i say people should care about what they think.)

keep in mind both of these conversations didn't happen at once. they were a week or 2 apart. Anywho, my dad also found it necessary to warn me about my "power" of persuasion, my charisma, said that people could follow me and get hurt if I go the wrong way, and he knows i wouldn't ever hurt anyone on purpose. He's right of course, i don't want ot hurt people, but i say that he should go warn all the people, not me! LOL

im still on the plan.

Though, after the discussion me and Nick had the other day about what our futures may hold, i found a small affirmation with what my dad had to say. I've been thinking since then that im going to watch myself, pay attention to growing and learning as much as i can (safely, hehe) and the fact that my dad figured i should watch out, or I might endanger other people, i think he had the right idea in affirming what i felt, just didn't have the right details for it (he figured that my charisma was potentially dangerous if i didn't watch myself...I figure you know what will be really dangerous if I don't learn good self discipline. Hehe. :)


1 Comments:

At November 28, 2004 at 12:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

ahh, charisma...

it will be ultimately necessary, Peter...

"the power, to move you..."

if we have more than just faith in ourselves, if we are absolute, then others will not get hurt...

 

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